15 thoughts on “POETRY

  1. Scary. Hope meeting reality. Desire running into truth. The idea some have of an easy fix to that which sadly has become a deeply ingrained life threatening part of us. Heavy thoughts, Bethany. Hugs

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      • I , like you lived it. You once wrote a post about suicide. I told you I never wanted to end my own life, which is true. However I have many times wanted my life to just stop. The feelings , the pain, the memories to just stop, go away. I am not sure if that is wanting to kill yourself like suicide or not. But I was at that point where I could have turned that wish into an action when I met Ron. I rarely have those times now. It is few the times I want it to stop. Life has gotten to have joy and meaning for me again. I like living now. But the memories and the feelings of those memories are still there, buried deep down. Yes , I understood your post and I know you will understand when I say I really wish I did not. Best wishes. Hugs

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      • You are in such a better place now with Ron. I hate that you were ever in “that” place. I understand your description. It is not necessarily wanting to die but wishing for everything else to stop. The memories and nightmares and all of the bad to just go.
        Having health issues on top of the PTSD for me lately has become difficult. Managing all of these meds and finding what will work and what will help without causing other things to get worse is complicated.
        I am still searching for not quite the fix all of my problems but something to ease the pain of it all. Whether that comes from therapy or a pill or God or nature or wherever I do not know. I am open to healing and feeling joy my body and brain are just struggling with how to find it.
        Thank you for sharing your thoughts and experiences.
        I am hoping one day, these things of the past, and even present, will only be fleeting thoughts

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      • Bethany you are an inspiration. Every post you write exposes the most intimate feelings you are going through. That you are willing to share to help others is grand. Most prefer not to face head on the things that happened to them and are afraid of what people will think of them when they know what was done to them. Yet you willing share everything, most importantly your struggles to deal with it all. This shows the strength you really have. You seem to have a much better understanding of what this does to people than most I have read. I do wish I had words that would help, or some way to make things better for you. You face willingly what most of us have tried to run from. Best wishes. Hugs

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      • You have given me more compassion, support, encouragement, and understanding than every one in my life combined (aside from my husband ofcourse). Your words are profound. Thank you.

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