Poetry: mom

Will you cry and tell your friends you can’t see me?

Will you get sympathy?

“You know it’s just so sad I can’t see Bethany”

Oh but you get to see her twin

On OUR birthday

So what do you say then?

What excuses do you tell your friends?

I hope they know my last name

So they can skip on over to my poetry

So they can see your words are just

Empty

I really hope they look at you and truly see

You CHOSE this life for you AND for me.

I hope they see you for who you really are.

I know you like other’s pity

But you certainly don’t deserve it for me.

Do they know of my PTSD?

My muscle disease?

My atrophy?

My agony?

And that YOU left ME?

Or does that not play into your planned sympathy.

So tomorrow it’s my birthday as you know

That surprise twin who miraculously showed!

As you celebrate with him

I hope you OWN

All YOU’VE created

All the sorrow

While you were gone you missed my short hair

You’d probably not like it anyway

You’ve missed all my exciting photography

Eh you’d say it was just a phase.

You also missed the seizures and hospital stays

Oh and the last 3 years of my birthday cakes

And every other in between day

And your granddaughter…but with that…I cannot say…

Remember me on this day you gave birth

This day you brought me onto this earth

And chose to kick to the side like a piece of dirt.

Thankfully my husband of 21 years has reminded me of my worth.

He doesn’t pick and choose

Pieces of me to win or lose

Like you do

Or did

He’s proud of all of me

Even the emotions, the abused parts,

And God forbid!

The fact that I sometimes feel expected hatred.

46 years I’ve lived

I will celebrate despite you mom

Just at least tell your friends today

YOU chose to move on

It’s my birthday

Yet to you

I’m dead and gone.

Thankfully,

I’m surrounded by those who see me fighting

And strong

They chose to stay

You chose

Wrong

Like the sad lyrics

Of a tragic love song

I guess the saying is not true

There is not always a mother daughter bond

Sometimes I miss you

It doesn’t last for long

As I’m reminded

On my birthday

I don’t even have a mom

6 thoughts on “Poetry: mom

  1. Hard to like this one but I do like the heart felt and so emotional poetry. You have a real talent for expressing yourself this way.

    So the whole poem is really great, but this:

    “Thankfully,

    I’m surrounded by those who see me fighting

    And strong

    They chose to stay

    You chose

    Wrong”

    That just says it ALL.

    It’s so sad that it’s this way no matter what time of year, but birthdays are particularly difficult. Your mother is definitely missing out.

    Hope you had a decent birthday anyway.

    Like

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